How To Be a Better Mom To Other Moms

There has been a terrible amount of Mom bashing going on lately. Worst of all, by other Moms! Whether it is virtually or in person, it all hurts just the same.

Silly, Judgy Judgersons.. you'll get nowhere with 'tude like that! Well, you'll get somewhere. It just won't be somewhere warm and cozy. Keep running your mouths and you could end up in traction ostracized from all the internets in all of the lands.

In case you don't know how to shut your ever loving mouths be a better person to other Moms, I've devised a list to help you. Take notes. There will be a test at the end.

1. Holding open a door goes a long way.
If you see a Mom with little ones and her hands are full and her hair is a mess and she just can't quite get the door without letting go of a child's hand or dropping something while you walk on by with your annoyingly well behaved school age child, take a freaking second out of your perfect existence and teach your kid something about compassion: HOLD. OPEN. THE. DOOR.

2. Don't give dirty looks. 
You know that kid that screams through the entire grocery trip because they couldn't have the fruit roll-up? Me, too. You know that mom that gives that kid that fruit roll-up so she can hear herself think? Me, too. You know that cashier that sighs when that Mom hands her that opened box that was enough to quiet that kid? Me, too. Don't scowl at that Mom. Cock your head to the side with a sympathetic smile and move along. Nothing to see here.

3. Offer encouragement, not advice.
When you're walking alone in a parking lot and you see a Mom with her hand on her head trying to contain the tears and wishing booze was served in IV form while her child performs amazing feats of carseat avoidance, don't offer trite advice. Rub her shoulder. Give her a squeeze. Tell her it won't always be like this. Ask if there's anything you can do.

4. Don't be an internet troll.
Just because you don't like what another Mom said in a Facebook status or a Tweet or a Pin or a blog post, doesn't mean you have to go and get all judgery on her. I mean, really.. who died and gave you the last word on proper Mommying? NOBODY. That's who. Sometimes, Moms need an outlet. Social media is that place for many, many Moms. Some Moms vent by being inspirational. Some by being mushy gushy. Some by whining and complaining. Some by being snarky and funny and sarcastic. So, there is variety out there if you need to read other Mom's vent sessions. Just choose the genre that best fits your personality instead of being all holier-than-thou and showing you're ugly on the inside to a Mom with a different style.

5. Put yourself in her shoes.
Picture this: You see a mom lugging holding an infant seat, a purse, two diaper bags and she is struggling to control the rowdy toddler that is becoming stronger by the second. Suddenly, the toddler breaks loose of her mother's death grip and takes off towards the road. Her mother drops everything (including the infant seat in the middle of a parking lot) to save her toddler from imminent death. The only thing she can reach is hair blowing in the wind. So she grabs it, essentially balding the toddler and throwing her to the ground. TWO FEET FROM A BUSY ROAD. After securing the toddler in her carseat through whines and cries that Mommy hurt her and before retrieving the infant seat, that mother pukes in the middle of that parking lot and feels like something inside of her just died. Don't gasp in disgust at her choices. Pick up the infant seat for her. Or the pile of bags. Or better yet, offer her a hug and a mint. Don't avert your eyes and scoff as if you didn't just witness a child almost die instead of only seeing her mother yank hair.

So, here's your test. Did you take notes? Are you ready for this? Here it comes.

Do these things. To strangers. At least once.

A Mom is a Mom. Whether in life or in death, by birth or by heart, working or stay-at-home, single or married, rich or poor. We're ALL Moms. So, hang up your judging robes and put on your mom jeans. Have some empathy and don't be so snobby.

Carry on.